Laughing Lotus Love Blog

Express Yourself

2011-07-17T23:09:15Z

Om Vaakdeviyai cha Vidhmahe
Virinji Pathniyai cha Dheemahe
Thanno Vani Prachodayath.

Om, let me meditate on the goddess of speech
Oh wife of Lord Brahma, guide me towards a higher intellect
and let Goddess Vani illumine my mind.

Growing up in a Bengali household, I was familiar with most of the Hindu gods and goddesses from a young age. They were romantic beings that swept me away to lands with demons, fires, and animals who could fight and talk. Some intrigued me more than others- especially the dual forces known as Lakshmi, the goddess of plenty, and Saraswati, the goddess of knowledge and art. They were both so alluring with what they offered my imagination. Lakshmi enchanted me with her beauty and the promise of riches. Saraswati intimidated me with her skills in the arts. Now, having been inspired to write about nada yoga, the yoga of sound, I asked myself to look at the lovely water goddess, the smart sister, who championed the rights of expression. I am now thoroughly beguiled by Devi Saraswati.

I was raised thinking (because of my Sanskrit Professor Grandfather's dogged beliefs in the myths) that Saraswati was the eldest daughter of Parvati (manifestation of Durga) and Shiva. However, like so many of these mythologies there are multiple stories of her birth.
In another story, Brahma, the creator of the universe, found himself surrounded by chaos- cacophony and disorder and nothing solid surrounding him. How to bring about order? Ah Ha! Wisdom. Out from his mouth emerged Saraswati in her full form (a full bodied woman in white). Saraswati then used words and music to bring about order in the Universe. In yet another story, an even more ancient one from the Rigveda, she is thought to have emerged from the Saraswati river (hence her other name, Vagdevi-water goddess). In any case, her birth ensured her importance in the world as a symbol of purification and nourishment.

Saraswati wears only white to emphasize her austerity. She has four hands representing mind, intelligence, alertness, and the ego. She holds Vedic scriptures in one hand and a mala in the other. The other two hands are used to play the Veena, that emanates the sound of OM (eternity and love). She sits on a white lotus (goodness and purity) and has her ride of choice- a swan or two next to her- a symbol of the discernment between good and evil. A peacock is often depicted in her presence representing hubris. Since Saraswati is anything but arrogant, she chooses to not ride on the peacock but have it around to prove a point-learn and grow, but don't let it get to your head. Like her mother, Durga, she is a fierce warrior who controls the world for order's sake. One tale goes that Shiva was furious with the injustice he was seeing in the world. So he decided to destroy everything he could see with his third eye. Explosion and devastation lay everywhere until the goddess came around and stated that Shiva only destroyed what was impure and corrupt. She took folds of water and gathered up the agni (fire) that was shooting out of Shiva, took it to the bottom of the ocean and lay it there to lie dormant. It would only rise up, she said, if mankind were to become corrupt and ignorant. Hopefully, for us, the fire will stay asleep for a while...

In another tale, she brings back the stolen soma (nectar of life) plants from the Gandharvas, the celestial creatures who stole the soma plants from the Gods. In return, she teaches them ragas and raginis (musical notes that is the basis for Indian classical music). Hence music was her gift to turn these wayward creatures from bad to good. She forgave them using beauty. What a woman!

Saraswati is a paragon of independence and non-attachment. She is wise, well read, and needs no one. Although Brahma eventually wins her heart (it takes him a few tries to get there including losing a head-the one he created just to look at her all the time). Their union is one of understanding and professionalism instead of passion and romance. Saraswati only wants freedom to express herself and for others to have that sense of liberation or moksha. She doesn't care for saris, gourmet cuisines, or 6000 square foot castles in the Himalayas. She is said to have written the Vedas, the ancient spiritual texts, encouraged the creation of music, and saved the world from evil and misunderstanding with her mind. We all have ego, as Saraswati admits, but we don't have to lie victim to it. We can also forgive and heal others with what we say and create. The words we choose to speak can bring about peace. The music we choose to write and perform can transpire joy and love.

Saraswati doesn't look down on wealth and success. She just stands for intellectual growth--there's nothing wrong with helping to better our wealth. She is a symbol of the affluence of knowledge. We can learn more, study histories and languages, write books, sing songs and find freedom with these modes of expression. For her, repression and hatred are the evils. Music and poetry are manifestations of the divine within us.

Now having some life experience in the background, I can fully start to appreciate the glory of this Goddess. The examination of these deities can be complicated. None of them are superficial. None of them are easy to define (although I just attempted to do it with one in a short space) and no one really has the story correct. All we can do as spiritual followers is learn and grow from what we read. Saraswati's message- we don't have to be austere and abandon pleasure. But we do have to be aware of excess and do the things that make us grow into more learned and fuller human beings. Finally, we can ask the question: what and how can we contribute to the world for its betterment?

Om Aim Saraswatiya Namaha

The Oxygen Mask

2011-02-20T15:31:19Z

When I started teaching yoga almost four years ago, one of the most immediate urges I had was to get my butt back into therapy. I didn't have the clarity of mind to know why, I just knew I needed it. At my first session back, I told my therapist that I had been really tired, working all day teaching yoga, which I loved, but between my friends who were in my class and my roommate and my friends who didn't take my class and my boyfriend at the time, and me, I was TIRED. "Well, of course," she said, "you're a healer now. Its the same rule when you're a healer as when you're on an airplane: you have to put the oxygen mask on yourself before you put it on someone else." And from that point on, there's been only one thing that I am absolutely sure of, if I don't take really good care of myself, no one is going to get taken care of!

I also have many friends who are healers and we all struggle to find a way to have our full time jobs, to enjoy this incredible city with all of its incredible people, and to take care of ourselves, and it's always interesting to watch which one of these priorities flies out of the window first. I think that bit iss different for each of us.

My oxygen mask is many different things: it's my therapist, healthy food, plenty of water, taking class, the students who spend time in class with me, all of my amazing teachers and friends. But most of all my oxygen mask is my breath, my sitting practice, which has become so sacred to me. Without that quiet time that I have to myself every morning...I wouldn't even know how to take care of myself. Without it, I don't think I would know who I really am (my breath) versus the stuff that my life is made of (everything else). It is where I get all of my most valuable information, and where I go to get inspiration from that never-ending well of my inhale and my exhale.

If you don't already have a sitting practice, I CANNOT recommend it enough (all of my friends can vouch, I'm like, "talk to the hand until you sit on your butt"). All you need is you, a comfortable seat (a bolster or a few yoga blankets) and a kitchen timer. Start by setting your timer to 10 minutes. Just WATCH as all your stuff comes up and PRACTICE knowing that all that stuff is not you. You are infinite, beautiful, peaceful beyond peaceful--and how would you ever know it without stopping to notice?

Namaste!

Heart Wide Open

2011-02-11T18:47:31Z

Bhakti month at Laughing Lotus is a time of celebrating love in all its forms: romantic love, divine love, self love. Our yoga practice makes our connection with love even more rich, and all the more tangible. We become lovers of being in love, basking in the afterglow of how wide open our hearts can actually get through the practice of devotion.

But at some point, in some cold, harsh moment, we realize that all this love-giving and love-making will land us in a tear-filled heap of brokenness. Someone will break our heart, some moment will disappoint us, and just as quickly as we thought we had it all, our greatest joy can be taken away.

Intellectually, we know this to be true. Life teaches us again and again that love and loss go hand and hand, and that it's "better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all." But somehow this great glowing heart and the physical body that holds it can respond differently. We become scared, protective, and overly cautious of what feels like a wounded part of ourselves. We start to avoid moments or interactions that might stretch us too far. "I might get hurt!" we fear. We create versions of our lives that feel safe and predictable, thinking, "I never want to feel that kind of pain again!" Our physical body becomes more rigid, shoulders rounding and tension moving into the joints. We create an encasement around our emotional and spiritual selves of "protection" because the realities of life have felt too brutal. Humans have a very hard time reconciling that life involves both great love and great loss.

But I would like to suggest a concept that asks us to seriously step up to the spiritual plate. It's one I'm working on diligently and without quite having mastered it, it's something I do believe to be true: Our losses make our capability to love even greater--if we let them.

I once read a thought by a Talmudic Rabbi and this idea has given me motivation each time my heart has been broken. The saying goes: When the heart is broken wide open, GOD floods in.

What is God but pure, unblocked, unquestioned love? When life deals us a deck of cards that we judge as unfair or painful, don't we somehow end up growing to understand the meaning of that challenge at a later point in time? Can't we all agree that it's the challenging losses in life that have shaped us into the character-filled, dynamic, complex individuals we are?

So what if we take that a step further and as yogis, as seekers of light, we begin to accept moments of loss and challenge as opportune moments where we can let God flood in? Or, in other words, to become more loving beings?

If we have lost a great romantic love, we will most certainly appreciate the next great love when he or she walks into our lives, and with even greater depth. If we have lost someone to death, their memory and impact on our lives becomes even more precious. If we miscarry, the baby we eventually hold in our arms will be even more of a miracle. If we lose a job, we discover our own industrious nature to create the next unique opportunity.

But most importantly is that through our moments of suffering and loss we become part of a great chain of compassion, holding deep understanding for every other person who has felt a similar loss. To look in another person's eyes and to say, "I truly understand."

Now God is flooding in.

As we celebrate love and delight in its many forms, let us also dance with the highs and lows of life. Instead of resisting its flow, breathe into life, go with it, and watch your heart get bigger and wider with each incredible vinyasa.

Here are a few of my favorite heart opening asanas. Let each shape remind you that we have a choice to embrace the many dimensions of love.

Uttita Trikonasana with some extra love.

Allow your top arm to drift behind your back in triangle post. The hand will hold onto your upper thigh. Begin rolling your upper shoulder back, turning your ribs higher and leaning your upper body back into your supportive arm. Trust that you can help your heart further open.

Ardha Chandrasana and then some!

From half moon pose, begin to bend your elevated leg at the knee. The top hand will reach back and find the ankle. Keep breathing as you find the beautiful balance between staying grounded and opening the heart.

Anjanayasana with all your intention!

Once you have your back leg grounded into the floor, use your shin and front foot to ground the pose. Your intention to lift and extend your heart space will allow this pose to naturally expand. Think of how far you're willing to open to every experience of your life and let this shape be a symbol of that willingness!

Ustrasana to the max!

It can be easy to lose your breath in camel pose, just as it can be easy to "not breathe" when times are tough. The key is to breathe confidently and fully even as you completely urge your heart higher and higher.

Experience the delight of opening your heart so fully! Namaste!

Stoke it up : Make it Devotional!

2011-01-31T15:00:17Z

I don't know about you but the winter months are very challenging for me. I struggle to stay in balance and not get sick. I am getting better at it as the years go on. I used to get sick every single winter with a bad cold, or a sinus infection that turned into bronchitis. But with the help of my yoga practice, I am finding it a lot easier to stay in balance.

When the winter months come and it is dark and cold, we must pay even more attention to our health, eating right, staying hydrated, and getting plenty of rest. It is also easier to get depressed when our energy is lower. So keep yourself warm and stay inspired. Study something that you have always wanted to know more about. Read a good book suggested to you by a friend. Sit down somewhere cozy, light some incense and a candle, nestle up to a great book of devotional poetry, like Rumi or Hafiz to warm your spirit and wake yourself up! Beautiful background music will inspire your own inner music to sing!

When it comes to your yoga practice, climb onto your mat daily and make it devotional! Fire up your practice with some purifying Breath of Fire Pranayama. Start in a comfortable cross-legged seat with your arms extended up into a V overhead. Curl your fingertips in toward the pads of your hands and reach your thumbs in toward each other like a spiritual hitchhiker. Begin with rapid inhalation and exhalation, in and out through the nose. Take an equal emphasis on the inhalation and the exhalation and continue to pump it in and out rhythmically and rapidly. Light that internal fire, the desire and discipline to go out beyond the limitations of your mind. In Sanskrit it is called "Tapas"- the discipline which will carry you through the dark, cold months of winter. Fan that flame with your breath. Ancient yogis were sometimes called "Tapasvin" which means, one who takes on Tapas, or voluntary self-discipline.

Stoke it up by moving through some grounding standing poses. Feel your presence in the moment as your connect to the feet sturdy on the mat. Add in some devotional warriors, allowing yourself to surrender into the moment, bow down to your life as it is right here, right now. It is very humbling. Rise up and tip it back into a peaceful warrior, draping your arm down the back leg as you extend up through the other arm. You will start to feel the peace as you flow through these movements with the current of your breath carrying you into the moment.

Make sure to spend plenty of time at the end of your practice down on the floor forward bending, diving in to your center to honor the process you have been through to open up to your life. Lastly, take an extra long savasana, resting flat on your back. Roll up a blanket as a bolster under your knees to release the low back, place a blanket under your head as a little pillow and even cover up with a blanket to stay warm, and settle in for a deep relaxing, rejuvenating rest after all the movement. If you have an eye pillow, place it over your eyes for the ultimate dropping down into the moment. Devote yourself to uncovering who you are beyond all the thinking. Our minds are always so busy, now is the time to stop thoughts and see who you are when all the judgments and the attachments have been released. Experience the vast space, the warmth and the freedom that is inherent in every moment!

Playlist:

"Mumtaz," by Bombay Dub Orchestra

"Temple Gateway," by Desert Dwellers

"Something About Us," by Daft Punk

"I feel Awake," by Suphala feat. Edie Brickell

"Ganesh Is Fresh," by MC Yogi feat. Jai Uttal

"Smithereens," by Annie Lennox

"This Must Be The Place," by Talking Heads

"Inside," by Moby

If It Is Not Too Dark by Hafiz

Go for a walk, if it is not too dark.

Get some fresh air, try to smile.

Say something kind to a safe-looking stranger, if one happens by.

Always exercise your heart's knowing.

You might as well attempt something real along this path:

Take your spouse or lover into your arms

The way you did when you first met.

Let tenderness pour from your eyes

The way the Sun gazes warmly on the earth.

Play a game with some children.

Extend yourself to a friend.

Sing a few ribald songs to your pets and plants -

Why not let them get drunk and wild!

Let's toast

Every rung we've climbed on Evolution's ladder.

Whisper, "I love you! I love you!" to the whole mad world.

Let's stop reading about God -We will never understand Him.

Jump to your feet, wave your fists,

Threaten and warn the whole Universe

That your heart can no longer live Without real love!

WHEN GRAPES TURN by RUMI

When grapes turn

To wine, they long for our ability to change.

When stars wheel

Around the North Pole,

They are longing for our growing consciousness.

Wine got drunk with us,

Not the other way.

The body developed out of us, not we from it.

We are bees, And our body is a honeycomb.

We made the body, cell by cell we made it.

Patterns: the Key to Awareness and Change

2010-12-12T17:07:24Z

Have you ever looked at the clock and it happened to be 11:11? Or thought about the coincidence of numbers? This year on 11/11 I discovered a podcast called 11:11. On the same day, my friend Alison found the companion magazine called 11:11. Then, while listening to the host of the 11:11 podcast, I sat down to write this blog post and noticed it was 11:11 AM.

The amount of numerical coincidences got me thinking about patterns, and the way that being aware allows us to notice even more patterns. When we open our minds to notice patterns and what's going on in the world around us, we start to see the way ordinary objects seem to operate in tandem with the rest of the universe as part of an intelligently designed system. When we pay attention and allow our consciousness to notice these subtleties, it helps us to imagine that we are a part of that universe, that our lives are moving on the trajectory as part of a larger picture.

Paying attention to patterns in the external world helps us to acknowledge our internal emotional and physical habits. We can begin to ask ourselves if forcing that pose is really what our body wants to be doing, or if we keep wanting to rely on a friend for emotional support, even though the friend never seems to be available. Just by paying attention, we can evaluate what's working for us. The host of the podcast asks a question relevant not only to our yoga practice, but to the way we exist in the world: "Are you willing to experience yourself in a greater way right now?" By cultivating an awareness of our perspective in that moment, we can figure out if that's the point of view we actually want to have. Only by knowing where you are can you decide if you want to change.

Yielding to Your Mental and Physical Inflexibility

2010-12-10T15:17:30Z

"I can't do yoga--I'm not flexible enough," is often the mantra of the yoga newbie. The assumption is that one must possess the innate flexibility of Gumby to even set foot in a yoga studio. The truth, for me, is a little different. Left to its own devices, my body's natural state of being is more akin to the Tin Man than Gumby. I grew up horseback riding, bike riding and skiing. In high school, I was on the track team. I was athletic for sure, but flexible I was not.

In my mid twenties, I was diagnosed with debilitating sciatica. Let alone not being able to touch my toes, I couldn't even touch my knees. I was told by my doctor to try yoga and to go easy on the exercise (I was the step aerobics queen).

"How hard can it be?" I wondered when I stumbled upon my first Vinyasa class. I left the class sweaty, shaking and exhausted, but I felt so spacious. But, here's the thing: it wasn't so much about feeling stretched out physically (although, believe me, I used muscles I didn't even know I had)--it was about having more freedom mentally. Discovering the pause between the thoughts, the moments of stillness with the breath and the sublime state of letting go in savasana--those were the things that kept me going back for more.

As Patanjali wrote in The Yoga Sutras, the yogic path is essentially an inward one. It's about being kind to yourself when others in class are effortlessly in hanumanasana (spilts), and you are propped up on blocks. Letting go of the idea that you "should" be anywhere other than where you are right now, both on and off the mat. Cultivating a sense of reverence for the present moment. Creating mental space by linking movement to the breath. Feeling the connection of body, mind and spirit. These are some of the many paths into the yoga practice, all of which ultimately lead within and to a more intimate relationship with oneself.

Image by rachel a. k. via Flickr

Through a dedicated yoga practice, one's physical flexibility most certainly changes over time. I am living proof of that. However, the yoga practice has taught me that being flexible is often more a state of mind than a physical state of being.

So the next time you or someone you know, professes to be too inflexible to try yoga, take the first step and encourage them to, as well: show up, take a seat on your mat, and check your judgment at the door. You'll be glad you did.

_________________________________________________________________

Interested in learning more about this practice of being with your body? Check out Joanne & Ashleigh's retreat to Dominica from March 12-19th, 2011. Details can be found here: http://nyc.laughinglotus.com/pops/20110312joanne.html.

Namaste!

Instantly Gratifying Restorative Poses (and Workshop!) with Randi

2010-12-07T14:15:50Z

Dear Friends, Family, Students and Fellow Teachers-

I have a confession to make. I am brutally and inconsolably impatient. I want IT immediately if not sooner. What is IT? Anything that gives me some kind of satisfaction: a well-taught class, a handstand in the center of the room, the sense that I'm in the perfect relationship--you name it!

With the presence of impatience comes the open-ended invitation to all its closest friends: worry, agitation, stress, and anxiety. I know I'm not alone in my plight. We all find ourselves in these cycles of longing and consequential dissatisfaction. Despite the incredible impact my yoga practice has had on my impatient tendencies, I started realizing that days were zooming by and I wasn't spending nearly enough time in gratitude or doing what Dana Flynn reminds us to do: "meditate on our beautiful lives!"

It wasn't until I discovered the restorative yoga practice that certain truths began to reveal themselves to me. The sutras say that at our core we are already ompletely peaceful and whole, that we need only remove the illusion that we are anything but that. During a restorative practice, I would literally feel the physical manifestations of worry and anxiety melt away. My breathing would open up, and that place that is always peaceful inside of me seemed like a place I could actually visit.

The restorative poses are designed so that the body begins a process of slowing down and softening from the inside out. Organs relax, muscles release, thoughts slow down, and the nervous system shifts from a reactive state to a more passive one. The process is shockingly scientific but the experience is blissful.

This type of relaxation isn't as far from you as you think. With limited time and few props, this powerful and important process of letting go can be yours. All you need are two blankets and two blocks. Try these poses at home or before your vinyasa class begins!

Seated Meditation: Begin with a moment in a comfortable seat, eyes closed. Tap into your breath and let it fill your body. Even if your thoughts are running wild or your body is tight with tension, simply invite yourself into your restorative practice- a time that is meant for you to just BE. The poses will do the work for you; you just need to show up. Sit here for a minute or two and focus on your breath.
Restorative Child's Pose: Roll two blankets into a bolster. Prop the bolster up on a block. Sit on your heels and widen your knees around the bolster, draping your chest forward. Turn your head to one side and hug the bolster giving a sense of security to yourself. If the tops of your feet are sensitive, you can place a blanket under your shins and feet. Take deep breaths and relax here for about five minutes.

Restorative Backbend/Goddess Pose: Take your rolled up blanket/bolster (make sure its rolled tightly so that it feels firm). Simply bring your lower back to the bolster. Lay back with the bolster along the entire length of your spine. Bring the soles of your feet together and allow your knees to widen. Place one block outside each thigh for support. Take deep breaths, allowing your belly to become soft, like a lagoon. Stay in this pose for up to ten minutes to really go deep.

Legs Up the Wall: Take your two blankets. Make them into a square shape and stack one on top of the other and slide them against the wall. Sit on the blankets with your right body against the wall. Roll onto your back and swing your legs up the wall. Allow your lower back to ground and your arms to splay. The edge of the blankets should be right under your shoulder blades. Stay here five to seven minutes, enjoying this shift in perspective and blood flow. With deep breaths, this pose can have a very calming effect.

Savasana: A simple way to make savasana extra comfy is to roll up two blankets and to prop them under your knees. This will help your lower back release. Ask your body and spirit to let go completely. Stay here for for five to ten minutes.

Come experience these shapes and more, as I host a Restorative Workshop, a true SPA FOR YOUR SOUL on December 12^th, from 2:30 to 4:30 at Laughing Lotus. Sign up ahead here!

Together, let's meditate on our beautiful lives!

Happy Holidays!

Cooling Down in the Cold Weather

2010-12-05T02:05:44Z

I am on fire! I start wondering, "How am I going to get some sleep tonight?!"

Heating myself up to exhaustion is how I roll sometimes. Bit by bit I have learned to slow down and unravel my mind from the daily routines and give my body and mind the rest it deserves. My friend Nibohdi, an Ayurveda Vaidya (or Ayurveda physician), recommended once that I surround myself with water, take surf lessons, and once a month go out to the countryside and let Mother Nature wind me down, cool me off. I found this easy to accomplish during the summer (although I have to admit I didn't surf). These practices, however, can be a little difficult to achieve as the seasons change and the temperatures drop. (No, I am not ready for the polar bear club!) So let me share this cooling routine that I've been practicing in the evenings, at the end of those New York-intense-days that have left me with a lot of fire inside, making it really hard to fall asleep.

Start by sitting in Virasana

Image via Wikipedia

Sit on your heels, move your feet apart--a little bit wider than your hips--letting your seat come to the ground (sit on block or a blanket if you need to), with the tops of the feet and all 10 toes making contact with the ground. Bring your hands in Anjali Mudra in front of your heart close your eyes, and listen to your body.

Adho Mukha Svanasana (perro boca abajo) into Salamba Sirsasna (headstand) from Virasana

Come forward to all fours, lengthening one leg at a time, letting your breath lift you to your down dog. Stay here for a couple of breaths and find stillness in your body. Let your breath trickle through your body and lengthen the sides of your neck and your whole back body. Slowly bring your forearms to the ground, clasp your hands interlacing the fingers, bring your elbows shoulder-width and place the crown of your head to the ground, using your palms to embrace the back of your head. Press your forearms down into the floor as you move your shoulders away from your ears and start to walk your feet as close as you can towards your torso. Lift your legs straight up making an L shape and reach them straight towards the sky. * If this in new to you, you can practice against the wall and come up with bent knees. Never try to jump up! I find going upside down a great way of shifting your energy.

Let your legs come down take a child's pose.

Salamba Saravangasana

Lying on your back with a blanket or two underneath your shoulders, roll your knees towards your third eye, let your hands rest on your lower back and move the elbows towards one another. Lengthen your legs up, toes pointing up, inner thighs rolled in. Allow your gaze to soften and let the cooling qualities of the pose settle in your body. I like staying here for a good 3 to 5 minutes.

Iyengar calls this asana the mother of asasnas, as it strives for the harmony and happiness of the human system, just like Mother Nature does.

Slowly roll down (passing through halasana, plow pose) and roll up to a seated position with comfortably crossed legs. Close your eyes and stay closed in, bringing your mind to your breath. Meditating, letting the remains of the day melt away as you come back and bring your mind back to your breath.

Playlist:

"Naked Spirit" by Sainkho

"Washing of the Water" by Peter Gabriel

"Om Namah Shivaya" by Russill Paul

"Quiet 1" by Sheila Chandra

"Closing Prayers" by Bhagavan Das

Slowing Down to Open Up!

2010-11-29T13:56:31Z

I grew up as an athlete. My parents put me on a ski team and a soccer team when I was three, and I was on both of those teams for 10 years. My rebellion when I quit was to join the field hockey and lacrosse teams. Even after practicing yoga for 11 years, my body is very tight and somedays it feels better to take it slow to OPEN to the experience of the breath and the gift of right now, so I've thought of a gentle sequence to open you up to wherever you are in your own practice:

Child's Pose

I love to start with child's pose because of the automatic feeling of gratitude the shape inspires. It's also nice to start INWARD, to see how things feel for a few breaths and then move from there.

Cat/Cow

Greatest two-pose combo of all time. No explanation needed. :)

Image by whatnot via Flickr

Downward-facing Dog

If, I could I would LIVE (instead of "live" first I ACCIDENTALLY wrote LOVE:) in downward dog. A deep spread into the hands and the balls of the feet. A total giving of the head to the heart.

3-legged Dog with an open hip, bent knee

Just like a good book, crack that hip open all over again. Then, into regular downdog splits to square the hip off and draw then knee into the nose before dropping the knee off behind the right wrist for pigeon.

Pigeon prep/Pigeon

3 undulations folding forward and rising up again to re-commit my breath to my movement before finally folding forward and deeply into the shape.

From pigeon, roll up, let your body's weight drop over to the left to swivel the left leg around in front. Keep the right knee bent, sole of the foot on the inner left thigh.

Stargazer

Lift up to stand on the right shin and reach the left arm WAY WAY up and back. SUCH a great pose for those big muscles along our back bodies, the quadratis lumborum, since they can ALWAYS use some extra length.

Tabletop with eyes wide open, tongue sticking out.

Altar Pose. ALTER pose. Let go. Let go. And let go some more. That's the work.

Everything again, on the other side.

Upward-facing Dog

After the second altar pose, one more downdog. SLOW-MO roll into up-dog to feel the length of the front body.

Sukhasana

And then knees down to cross shins and find a comfortable cross-legged seat for meditation practice. Pranayama if you need it before finally settling. Feel your breath breathe you. And let go some more.

Jai Ma!

Sthiram, Sukham, and Letting Go of Doubt

2010-11-26T21:56:03Z

"JUMP INTO CROW POSE!!" Dana shouts from the back of the room. "Yeah.... probably not," the little doubter that lives in the back of my head whispers. I am in one of Dana's packed noon classes, absolutely soaked in sweat and quivering in downward facing dog. I take a deep inhale, bend my knees, lift my hips and launch my heart forward with the out breath. My shins land squarely on my triceps, but my toes are still clinging to the floor. "Just like every other time," whispers the doubter. I lift my toes off the ground, somewhat crestfallen, and come into crow from the ground up.

Now I know that jumping into crow from adho mukha svanasana is not an easy transition. I also know that "easy" and "difficult" are subjective terms that are temporary and not to be confused with truth. And I hold close to my heart the understanding that poses are simply a way into the realm of the spirit, not the end of the line. But in these holy moments where my body is facing an edge of some kind and I have no prior reference for actually lifting my hips high enough and measuring distance accurately enough to softly land in bakasana, what I encounter is mild frustration combined with a mistrust of the process. In other words, I run right into the sort of thinking that needs to be seen.

The asana practice is one of those experimental zones where we can really test the waters of the mind. Often what comes up is recognition of my own courage, compassion and longing to connect--but not always. I just as often slam into a psychic wall of fear and discontentment. I find that if notice myself being harsh or doubtful on the mat, chances are good that I approach myself with the same attitude off the mat. So I try to think of the breath as a compassionate searchlight that illuminates the darker corners of the mind. It's a safe place to encounter patterns of thinking that don't serve the moment or our long term spiritual growth.

The challenge is to be kind with ourselves when the breath uncovers a layer of doubt, judgement and negativity. "Sthiram Sukham Asanam" (firm but sweet yoga poses) is how Patanjali describes the asana practice. Steady and sweet is also a powerful way of approaching the mind and all of its discomfort. To stay put and not run, to not doubt myself even when doubting but simply to notice. When we approach ourselves with this unflinching and loving observation, our true power makes its way closer to the surface. It's a sustainable strength that is beyond sticking a pose and keeps us returning to the mat and bowing with reverence to whatever we experience.

Underneath every dark thought is the desire to love and be loved. When we approach ourselves and others with that understanding, we are living the mantra "Lokah Samastah Sukinoh Bhavantu" (may all beings be happy and free)--and may I contribute to that happiness and freedom. This is how we experience true limitlessness.

Leaning into the Back Body

2010-11-19T18:45:28Z

As a child growing up in a Russian-Jewish immigrant household, I was quickly programmed to think (and maybe even believe) in terms of worst-case scenarios. I learned instantly how to allow my mind to go to all those dark places whenever there was any uncertainty about the outcome of a situation: Why wasn't papa home yet? What if I forget all the moves during my upcoming dance performance? What if...The list goes on and on.

Not knowing any other way to exist, my inclination towards constant anxiety was a source of connection and a deeply shared bond amongst my family members. It made sense in the light of historical social and political injustice of life in the former Soviet Union, the constant mistrust of abusive authority figures, and the fact that both my parents each had to separate from their parents, not knowing whether they would ever see one another again, in order to come this country. In her beautiful book Radical Acceptance, Tara Brach summarizes this pattern in an old joke about a Jewish mother who sends a telegram to her son, "Start worrying, details to follow."

In yoga and meditation, we not only train the mind to remember the blessings of being alive in the present, but also practice surrendering our misconception that by worrying we can control the outcome of situations. When we practice leaning into the body, we practice having faith in the mysteries of the universe, in the path that we are already on as being the right one no matter what obstacles we are presented with. When we lean into the back body we practice trusting in things we even cannot see with our eyes but know in our hearts to be true. We can call this ultimate surrender to the Divine or Cosmic force Ishwara pranidana, the last of the niyamas, or ways in which our relationship with and perceptions of the world affect our life experience.

Leaning into the Back Body and Opening the Heart:

Playlist:

1. Barenboim & Co - Don Agustin Bardi

2. Vaquinha Mansa - Cesaria Evora

3. L'Amour - Rouge Rouge

4. Max Richter - On The Nature of Daylight

5. Charlie Haden and Pat Methany- Love Theme from Cinema Paradiso

Begin with pushpaputa mudra, palms full of flower petals, the sacred shape honoring the potential of growth and possibility, abundance, and the blessings that already exist in your life.

1. Knees, chest, chin (Ashtanga Namsakar): From downward dog, soften your knees, then chest, then chin to the ground. Stay here to open up the heart and throat chakra, the center of speaking your own truth.

2. Crescent lunge: From downward dog, breathe your right leg high into the air behind you. As you exhale, step your foot between your hands and soften your back knee to the ground with some padding if you need it. Walk your hands onto your right thigh, allowing your hips to sink forward. Hook your thumbs and sweep your palms all the way up above your head. Practice closing your eyes and leaning into your shoulder blades and back body, remembering you are supported.

3. Ardha chandrasana with backbend variation: From triangle pose, crawl your right fingertips forward as you gracefully shift your weight into the right leg. Lift the back leg up, stacking left hip on top of right. Bend your top knee and reach back for your foot with your hand. Go ahead and let that foot kick back into your hand to open up through the front of your thigh and chest. Then see if you can slip the bottom hand up to grab the back foot as well. Practice breathing into what's behind you, forgiving yourself for any tendencies or habits you're still holding onto from the past, exhaling to move any lingering negativity out of you.

4. Shiva side-plank variation: Shiva is the deity we call upon when we are yearning to participate in the Cosmic Dance of transformation. From peaceful warrior, cartwheel your hands to the ground and roll onto the outer edge of your right foot, right hand planted beneath your shoulder, into a side plank. Lifting your hips up and pressing the sole of the bottom foot the ground, see if you can bend the top knee and kick it back into your hand in a variation of Dancing Shiva. Try to keep your knees pretty close together.

5. Dhanurasana rolling side to side: One of the effects of constant fear and doubt is we lose a sense of humor and the ability to laugh at ourselves. Even as devoted yogis, it's liberating to smile and connect to a playful energy during your time on the mat. As you come into your bow pose, keep your knees close together and the back of your neck long. Reach your feet towards the back of the room. Then, as you inhale, rock up until you lift a little higher, then roll onto your right side, keeping hold of your feet. Try the other side. Enjoy rolling side to side as many times as feels good to you!

6. Ustrasana and ustrasana drop back: WIth some padding under your knees, come up to stand on your shins at the top of your mat. First try camel pose (ustrasana) a couple times, resting as you sit on your heels in between. Then, when you're ready, come back up again in one movement.

If you're ready for a more advanced heart-opener and have a full wheel practice, try dropping back from ustrasana. Keeping your toes tucked as you inhale lift your arms up, find that sense of trust and surrender as you reach your arms overhead and back toward the earth behind you. Let your palms find the ground in a full wheel shape as you roll back and use the balls of your tucked-under toes to help you up. Breathe into the beauty of your life in this very moment.

7. Savasana: Find some sweetness as you slow your breath down and practice the ultimate form of surrender as you roll your body, feeling its weight and releasing the fight against the constantly doubting mind, letting your breath roll through and cleanse every channel of your being.

Enjoy the warmth that the back of your heart has to offer. Namaste!

The Divine Mother's FOOD FOR THE SOUL!

2010-11-16T17:18:29Z

Some people find yoga as a physical practice, something that will help us blossom in strength, agility and weight loss. However this ancient sacred practice does far more than that--it connects us to nature, the Divine Mother, an aspect that many of us lose sight of in our every day lives. Today our world is full of chemical-based foods that out bodies cannot break down--mainly because these foods are easy to make and grab on the fly--and medicine that contradicts our bodies' natural cycles--for instance, a birth control that regulates our moon cycle to only four times a year. And although the rational/intellectual mind is useful in the work place, and helpful in determining what subway train to jump on, it hinders us and our ability to heal ourselves from within.

You only have to look as far as the closest farmer's market to know what you should be eating. Right now you might see green apples and root vegetables. Keeping in mind that nature takes care of us, most things of an orange color courtesy of our Divine Mother are good for your skin, so grab yourself a butternut squash and save yourself some money instead of buying an expensive, chemically-laden skin product you might find at Saks or Bloomingdales.

Take a second to think about what you're eating, and how it's working for YOU!

"Nature expresses herself by providing food for every species, by creating air and the means to breathe it, and by moving in rhythms and cycles that keep all life in harmony." Bri. Maya Tiwari

Amma Mama

2010-07-14T20:40:01Z

     It's a mystery of the universe that we can be looking at God and judge Her by Star Magazine standards...

    My uncle went to Amma's program in Dallas and wrote me a detailed email of all of his observations of the experience. What stood out to him the most was that both Amma and her leading Swami were (in his opinion) overweight. Oh my Goddess-- I cringed while reading and re-reading that quick slash of criticism-- are you calling the Divine Mother fat?! It was hurtful to feel darling Amma Ma judged by such superficial standards, but then I thought, Oh My Goddess, are we calling the Divine Mother fat all the time?!

     The shock of this superficial judgment made me realize I had been doing the exact same thing (maybe slightly less obviously) during the programs in New York. I was happy to be there and excited as I am every year Amma comes, but in my mind I was also host to a cranky streak, wishing people would move and let me get a better view. I started judging the experience by the actions of people around the hall--why couldn't my fellow volunteers be less frenetic while they sat people? It's a hectic process to get thousands of people seated and oriented, but did they have to do it so harshly? Etc, etc, etc.

     But everything changed once I had Darshan. On my way up it was like spiritual airport security. My Darshan token, S1, like a number at the DMV, was checked and double-checked as I neared the center of the blossom that is Amma's hugging seat. Once I made it that close, having persevered my own obstacles of impatience and pettiness, I glimpsed Amma in her simple and glorious task of Embracing the World. Once you finally do make it up there, the residue of the challenges you passed through to make it there melt away. Amma really is shining with LOVE! You can feel it pulsating from her. In that bright, clear light anything besides just Hugging and Loving life is extra, an unnecessary distraction. Why had I wasted my time even considering the weight of the program around me? Suddenly, in Her arms, enveloped in soft fat, my only rational thought was "Don't Let Go"! My outward eye of judgment to the program was no different than wishing it were skinnier! If Creation is the Divine Mother manifest, than any criticism of ourselves or others is calling Amma Fat! She is what She is and I believe it is Amma's deep-soaked acceptance and compassion that make her so radiant.

     There is an apt Yogi Tea bag quote that comes to mind now: "Where there is Love, there is no Judgment". Amma teaches this in her hugs. It is as if she is saying, "Isn't this enough? This Love--isn't it enough?" The dichotomy between my thinking beforehand and my feeling post Darshan was a lesson in the sharpness of mind and the softness of abiding in openness. This is the power of a Teacher, to lead you into an experience of yourself you can't access on your own. Practice grows naturally out of longing to return to that feeling. I still complain about waiting in line in life, but I am feeling more trusting that the judgments are just passing and that it's, big, plump, juicy, PHAT unconditional Love that makes the world go round.

Bhagavad Gita: In the Beginning was the Word

2010-01-16T18:37:18Z

Every year I read the Gita, but do I sing the Song of God? And I don't mean the Baptist Church Choir Song of God, I mean the quotidian one-woman a cappella ditty that expresses my connection however meagre to the divine. Or let me put it to you this way: ever have one of those moments where you're reading and your eyes and moving left-to-right across the page and you're following the words, but you're not quite taking them in? Or maybe, even though the words are in your native tongue, they have begun to resemble Aztec symbols rather that actual words. But you're there, you're getting the gist of the gist. You're reading it. You're soaking in it. And sometimes you light upon a sentence that resonates. "It's all temporary," you tell your roommate, your doorman or your cactus. "The heat, the cold, the pleasure, the pain. This too shall pass." And you feel it so much and you're ready to make it though all the rashes and the breakups, the head-cases and head-colds. Due to this aha moment, you sit down with the Gita, start reading and the same thing happens again. Only now you're peeved because Krishna spoke to you before. Is he on a yoga retreat? As Shirley Bassey would say, "Where do I begin?"

I say, if you really want to read the Gita, practice bibliomancy; let the book fall open to a particular page and check in a sloka or two. Then close the book and meditate on said sloka for a few. How does one warrior's deep, deep doubt/fear on the eve of battle transliterate into my life experience? I don't have Krishna as my charioteer, I have the conductor on the F train and nice and s/he may or may not be, I am not having a dharmic dialogue with her/him. Only I am having a dialogue with myself which some would say is insanity but enlightened others would recognize as the first step towards understanding the ubiquity and transcendence of my divine.

One of the only things I learned in grad school is that the word is meaningless outside the context. What I learned reading the Gita is the context is meaningless outside the Word. This is called metaphor and it's akin to applying the use of historiography to the making of legend, or rather, dharma. Think of Achilles. Homeboy didn't want to fight the war either. He hid in his tent with his boytoy Patroklus and wouldn't come out even though the Greeks were needing them some Achilles. It wasn't until Hektor slew Patroklus that Achilles got amped up enough to go out there and so some serious damage. Goodbye Trojans, hello Rome. When Orestes was told to slay his mother for killing his father, he just did so without too much thought. He CERTAINLY weren't no Hamlet. My point is that somewhere between just do it and four days a week on the couch is a middle ground where the divine lives, breathes and blossoms. It's a resource which, if we open to it, can lead us to The Source. If the Source scares or annoys you, good. Just feel this fact: to everything there is a season. Every war has the eve before, the week before, the month before. Nothing is out of the blue. Yet every war also contains the during and the after: peace. The question is, could you see your divinity in during your regular life as much as you do in your martial advent so that just maybe, at the eleventh hour, you look up, breathe into your own divinity and you just do it. Thus you are no longer the blind-seer, you are insight itself. You are dharma. You are Krishna.

The Price of Rebirth or I Can't Get it for You Wholesale

2009-12-25T19:37:28Z

It's never as good as the first time, though there is something to be said for a star-studded comeback. Just ask Cher. Or Shiva. Or Yeheshua Ben Nashri, AKA Jesus of Nazareth. Now there's a resurrection. Just when you think life is absolutely at its most excruciating, suddenly, you're born anew. And while Cher may need a team of expert stylists to turn back time, the Anointed One only needed to leave his mortal body in order to become God the Son. Much like Ganapati becoming Ganesh. NB: Both are the products of virgin birth. I'll give you my life's in a turnaround.

To be born again in its most literal sense is not only the first move towards enlightenment, but also part of an essential step on the career path away from fear and nepotism and towards understanding the true power of the self. A prime pre-Yeheshua example of the power and challenge of being twice born is Dionysus, son of Zeus and the mortal Semele. When Zeus' actual wife Hera found out about her lothario hubby's canoodling, she sought to destroy both babymama and child. Disguised as an old hag, she persuaded Semele to beg Zeus to present himself to her as his divine self, which he did, and as no mortal can behold a god in his true form, Semele died, forcing Zeus to nab the baby and sew it into his mighty thigh for incubation purposes. Thus was Dionysus, whose power would later rival that of his own father, born again, or should I say, delivered twice by C-section. As a side note, Lord Dionysus who wore his hair long like a girl and was somewhat of an esoterrorist, would later retrieve his mother from Hades and make her a goddess, thus Semele, like Mary, is also twice born. Rebirth: it's not just for men anymore.

Meantime, let's consider the modern mythos: Luke Skywalker with his beloved Rabbi, Yoda, in the Dagobah Yeshiva. Luke enters the Tree of Knowledge to fight his mortal enemy: his father, Darth Vader. Only when Luke manages to flick off Darth's mask with his manly light saber, does he finally see his true enemy: himself. Oy vey! Thus, by understanding his Shiva Nature, Luke is able to lift his rattrap X-Wing from the bog of past consciousness and be reborn as a Jedi Warrior. Only, to quote my dear friend Mary Childers, "Sometimes you have to cleave to leave." IE, in order to be reborn, ya gotta get radical, as in e radice-- from the roots. And ya gotta dig real deep to detach those stubborn buggers. And sometimes it feels like a break-up or a murder or an evisceration, your guts spooling from your belly like a sacrificial lamb to some cause you can't quite articulate; Think of YHWH--insert the Hebrew letter Shin and YHWH becomes Yeheshua and you basically have the New Testament. It's so much more than a copy-writing coup; it's the reification of an entire religion with just one little letter. It's simple but it sure aint easy.

Just imagine Paul in Damascus. It's not like the big change just happens, you must make it happen and then keep that bad boy going. IE: Rebirth is not only evolution, it's revolution and it's bloody and you gotta get with a whole new crew. Not to mention rebirth's absolutely an inside job, an esoteric metamorphosis from which you emerge, bleating and tender as a lamb. All right, I'll buy that it already feels like you've died and been reborn a gabillion times, but you're not Cher or Ganesha or Luke Skywalker and you don't have any of Jesus' street cred. But the beauty of rebirth, at least in the yoga tradition, is that you get to pick yourself up after every savasana, roll up your mat and be reborn with every practice, nay, every breath. As Shakti needs her Shiva, so creation needs destruction. Either that or a bigger closet.